DRAINED
EVERYTHING LIFE HAS TO OFFER
Soran was an anagram, that's what he told me.
I had to pay a lot for this watch...
it used to belong to Prof. Soran.
- Sorun? - Soran, it's an anagram.
And does it really works?
And so, how much will you give me for it.
The bad Smell comes from the drain.
I was afraid he might think that...
the Smell was coming from me.
Prof. Soran was a genius...
a sage, a visionary.
Could I take a closer look...
at your wonderful watch which belonged to Prof. Soril.
- Soran. - Sorun.
Soran, it's an anagram.
You know how I came by the watch?
Through an archeologist.
I didn't think it was that old.
The archeologist's name, I can't remember now...
but he used to be a spy.
I knew I was about to hear another one of those stories...
which I was in no mood for.
Despite the inestimable value of this watch...
I'm ready to offer it to you for a very special price.
Listen, I really don't want it...
if it had a cover at least, I'd buy it.
I don't think you realize...
the opportunity coming your way here.
Luck opens its doors to everyone...
at least once in a lifetime.
But if the opportunity is lost...
luck closes its doors.
What's your name?
I'd never in my life be able to pronounce that name.
You work here long?
One week.
What you reading?
James, what?
That's James. James Ellroy.
What's wrong, didn't like your sandwich?
No, it's just that I'm not feeling too hot.
I'd like something to drink. A soft drink.
- Which one? - Doesn't matter.
OK.
I could spend a whole week...
just looking at that ass.
Thank you.
For you.
Huh, raspberry drop, nice.
What's your name again?
I'd never in my life be able to pronounce that name.
I wanted to ask her to turn around, just once more.
- Bye. - Bye.
It's silver.
$ 30?
Life's not easy.
The Smell is coming from the drain...
have to fix the bathroom.
Aren't you going to touch your strogonoff?
No, I'm not very hu...
The invitations are already at the printers.
We're going to be real happy, you'll see.
You'll see.
I think only a naive person...
practically a retard, believes in happiness.
Heartless, that's what you are.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I didn't want to spoil this night...
it's just that I'm so nervous, with only one month left...
- I'm sorry. - I don't want to get married.
What?
You heard right, I don't want to get married...
I think we should end this whole shitty thing right now.
I'm sorry, sorry.
It's just that you said our relationship is shitty...
I'm sorry...
sorry.
I don't like you.
I never have.
I've never liked anyone.
You're crazy.
Now I'm the one who doesn't want to marry you.
I don't ever want to see you again. You lunatic.
The invitations are already at the printers...
what is everyone going to think?
- Another book... - Yeah.
How nice, Raymond.
Raymond, Raymond Chandler.
- I like to read too. - What?
I only read magazines, ones about movie stars.
Ohh, soap opera actors.
I could wait a whole week...
just to see her turn around.
Listen, I'd like some coffee.
Not hungry again, huh?
I'd pay, just to look at that ass.
Her name was a mixture of at least three other names.
Her father, her mother and some movie star.
Weird smell, huh?
Strange smell.
Must be from the drain.
How'd you get this?
Family heirloom.
$ 50?
Howdy.
No, no, not on the table, rickety...
- Can I? - What?
Sit down?
Right.
Gracias.
Does it work?
- It works... - Where you from?
- From Lima, Peru. - Peru?
- Yes, yes. - Near Bolivia and Chile.
No, on the other side.
Does it work?
Not really, but it's an "ornamento".
Avery nice ornamento, very old.
Ornamento, what's an ornamento? Like a decoration?
Yeah, ornamento, a decoration.
Sorry, but not interested.
You don't understand, I've come a long way, by bus.
Oh, by bus. And you'll go back by bus.
- To where, Peru? - No, your house.
This gramophone here, it's got a story.
Right, the bad smell... the bad smell, it's from the drain...
but come back when you've got something more worthwhile...
because "mi casa, su casa", and I'll always be here...
Ornamento, no.
- No. - No.
Gracias.
Look...
life isn't easy.
- This book the same as yesterday? - Yeah.
If the food here was any good, this place would be paradise.
I'll get you a soft drink.
- Why'd you say that. - What?
The bit about paradise.
- Let me have a look. - You work here?
Security.
- 54 cards, all types. - How much you want for them?
54 times 10, $ 540.
He won't even give you 10.
He don't like this sort of thing.
- He don't like this?!! - No way.
- He queer? - Since he was a little boy.
Shit... But wait, if he's queer better for me.
Fags have got good taste.
They know how to appreciate things. This is art.
Queerand has bad taste, if you want, I'll give you 10 reais...
- so you don't lose your trip. - But, from $ 540 to $ 10.
- It's up to you. - Twenty?
- Fifteen. - Eighteen?
You got two?
- You can keep the box. - None missing?
None missing. You can count.
You there with the violin.
How much?
$ 100, maximum!
It's a Stradivarius.
$ 112?
That violin must have some story.
- This place smells like shit. - It's from the drain there.
- No, no it isn't. - Yeah it is...
The Smell comes from the drain in there.
You're the one that stinks.
No.
No way buddy I've got a problem here in the bathroom...
here, in the drain.
And who uses the bathroom?
Me.
- Who else? - Just me.
So, where does the Smell come from?
- Energy. - Energy to you too.
- Energy, - Energy...
we're about to begin another show.
- Let's begin. - One, two and three and four.
One, two and three and four.
One, two, and three and four and do it.
I'll do it.
- Hold and go and together. - And together, do it.
- And do it. - I'll do it.
Aê. - Aê.
- Open. - I open.
- Hold it. - I hold.
- Lower your hips, stop, hold.
Hold, mad.
- Hold. - Order me around.
- Hold. - Go on.
Go on.
- Hold. - I hold.
- Hold. - Mad, I like it when you get mad.
Hold the thighs.
- Thighs, didn't get that right.
Hold the thighs.
- Thighs? - Hold the thighs.
I don't think I got that right.
I'll be right back, OK?
- You busy? - Yeah.
- Aren't you going to let me in. - What do you want?
You aren't going to get rid of me so easy.
I'm going to talk to your mother, and tell her...
that you called the whole thing off with only one month left.
I don't like my mother, I don't like you...
I never liked anyone.
Life isn't easy.
Aiê, aiê!
- Aiê. Aiê!
Aiê, aiê! - Aiê.
It's time to say goodbye. But don't forget...
I can't believe in a god who doesn't know how to dance.
- Sexy. - Sexy.
A big kiss from Samantha Rolls.
If she was here she'd slap me in the face.
I don't care about anyone.
I just don't want them to think...
that the Smell from the drain comes from me.
I can't hear you.
I've got to talk to you.
Mr. Lourenço, they left this for you, sir.
You know that God created the world...
but it was man that created comfort in the world.
It's in the bible.
- Right, man is god of comfort. - That makes sense.
The only animal who could do this is man.
You think a dog would do something like that?
A giraffe, would do that? Fucking long neck.
- And a whale, would do that? - He'd get everything all wet.
Only man is able to make something...
as comfortable as an upholstery chair. Feel it.
A jacket like this. Hum...
But man filled the world with bad things too.
- Like what? - Garbage.
No, I don't agree. Garbage is good.
- Garbage is the payback. - Payback?
Man created garbage to keep idle people busy.
- Gotcha. - You get me?
- Gotcha. - Too many bums around, man.
Shysters, guys who don't take baths.
Don't go near a shower, they're different from us.
Don't want to know about comfort.
Man created garbage to keep people like that busy.
- Gotcha. - The bum out front, could you...
- You want me to... - Yeah, I do.
- It's as good as done. - Right? You got me, huh?
Gotcha.
You get me?
Mr. Lourenço, what should I do with this?
Can't talk now.
Excuse me.
Listen, the bad smell comes from the drain.
- May I? - Please.
Thank you.
- Fifty. - Fifty what?
World Cup, 1950
Ahh, a real beauty...
- may I? - Please, help yourself.
That's from... Newtonia.
In celebration of the independence of Newtonia.
Well, listen buddy, they're worthless for me.
But I need money bad.
You're loaded with money, right?
Yeah, but it's that this money is worthless.
You can rest assured that mine...
won't be worth anything real soon either.
- I'll kill you. - Calm down.
The invitations are already at the printers.
Take it easy.
There's someone else, isn't there?
- Tell me you don't love me. - You don't need it.
- We're going to get married. - You don't need it.
- Yes we are... - You don't need it.
- I did everything, everything... - You don't need it.
You don't need it. You don't need it.
I love you.
Get out, I don't have anything to offer you.
And you have anything to offer me.
- Didn't bring the book? - No, not today.
You want a Cheese-sausage, Cheese-bacon...
Cheese-egg, Cheese-salad...
Anyone will do, I'm...
- Cheese-vinaigrette? - Cheese-vinaigrette, OK.
- Today's not my day. - Mine neither.
I brought you this.
I hope...
Amovie starmagazine.
Nice, thank you.
I wanted to grow old a long side that ass.
I wish I could tell her that.
THIS AIN'T GONNA BE THIS WAY!!!
Lourenço! I think you should know...
that my daughter is in the hospital...
because of you.
Who could have thought, canceling the wedding...
when the invitations are already at the printers.
I'm warning you, stay away from my daughter.
You hear me you son-of-a-bitch.
How much?
$ 200? $ 350?
Changed.
You don't know how desperately I needed money.
You look like that movie star.
You're sick buddy.
You're all yellow!
You know what I read in the magazine you gave me?
- The horoscope. - And what did it say?
Just good stuff, that I'm going to be happy.
Let me ask you something, you think I look yellow?
- Yellow? - Yeah, yellow.
You think I look yellow?
Everyone who comes in here is a little yellow.
Yeah, sure stinks.
It stinks, huh?
Look, it's all full of shit.
We're going to have to break the floor, it's the siphon.
Siphon? What's that?
Siphon is a siphon.
You're going to have to break the floor?
Break it all up.
- How much is that going to cost? - Around $ 300, $ 350.
Screw you, man.
Hey, take it easy, show some respect.
If it's that much, I prefer the smell.
So keep the smell, and the price is only labor...
- without material. - That's it then.
Get your things and beat it.
Sticking your hand in their like some fag...
didn't even take a good look.
But if you eat that shit, I'll give you $ 300.
I never wake up in the middle of the night.
Now I won't be able to sleep again.
Must be because of the drain. That's it...
from breathing in so much shit my brain is confused.
I have to break up the bathroom.
It's the fucking smell. That's what's getting me down.
It's all because of the smell from the drain.
I'll cement it tomorrow.
You call?
Go buy some cement. Go on, move it...
Yes sir.
Could you please not make that noise on your way back?
Sit down.
$ 50. Ohh, sorry about the smell.
- No problem. - I got a problem in the drain.
- In the bathroom, it's... - Clogged?
No, it'll get clogged as soon as I fill it with cement...
So, $ 50?
Not enough, the eye is worth more.
That eye has seen everything.
But that's the most I can pay.
Maybe next time.
- $ 100? - Still not enough.
How much?
$ 400.
No.
- $ 400 is too much. - No problem.
Maybe next time.
You drive a hard bargain.
No.
This eye hasn't seen everything.
It hasn't seen the ass yet.
Crazy.
Wait!
I want to show you something.
Wow!
Shit, out a sight.
This eye here used to belong to my father.
- Really, your father? - Yeah.
I've had this eye since I was a little kid.
- Nice, your dad die? - Yeah, in the war.
- What war? - Second World War.
I never knew anyone who died in the war.
- That's because you're too young. - Yeah, that's true.
You're kinda nice. You even look like that guy in the add.
So I've been told.
I've got to go, I think your eye is great.
- Out a sight, huh? - Out a sight.
OK, then.
What's that?
- A rake. - A rake?
Garden rake.
- You got a country home? - No.
- You weed? - If I weed?
- Yeah? - No.
You use this to gather dry leaves after they fall...
or weeds after weeding.
Gather weeds, huh?
- Pretty useful, huh? - Yeah.
I'll take it.
You won't be sorry, no way.
$ 10?
$ 20?
Let me show you something, look...
- What's that? - My father's eye.
- You order pizza? - Yeah.
Excuse me.
- Keep the change. - Thank you, enjoy.
Let me show you something?
Wow, man, that's weird. Where'd you get that from?
It came in a pizza.
- From our pizza joint? - No, this other one I order from.
Freaking one-eyed pizza maker...
Man, it reminds me of those munchies.
What munchies?
The kind that look like fingers...
ears, really weird looking.
Ohh... it kinda looks at us.
Wow!
Real weird man, but I've got to go.
I'll keep my eye on you, as you go.
- Right on. - Right on.
- Thanks, bro. - Thanks.
It's gold.
$ 20, at the most.
But, it's gold.
- Not interested. - Why not?
Because I don't like your face.
Sorry about my face...
but that's not what I'm offering you, it's the pen.
Don't want it.
I need the money real bad.
Would you do anything to get the money?
Not anything, no. I've got principles.
How far do your principles go?
What do you want me to do?
Nothing, you can go.
Aren't you even go to make me an offer on the pen?
I already have, but I take it back.
I'm not going to help you.
Go on, leave.
Long time no see, get tired of paradise?
- Almost. - Really?
No, but I went from paradise to hell.
I've got a couple problems myself.
- Life isn't easy. - Cheese-vinaigrette?
- Great. - To drink, the usual?
- The usual. - OK then.
Thank you...
- I'd like another one of these. - Another?
- For the offce. - But, sir...
No need to call me sir, you know my name?
Lourenço. Right. OK then.
What's the little rascal looking at, huh?
You...
your body.
You're a dream come true.
Paradise.
That ass of yours.
- Just the ass? - No, all of you.
Today is Friday, I get off at ten...
why don't you come by and pick me up...
for a beer?
- I can't. - You married?
- No. - Because if you are, count me out.
No, it's just I've got some things I've gotta do, at work.
- What you work with? - Real estate.
OK.then, maybe some other time.
It can't be like this.
If I start out this way I'm screwed too many commitments.
And I'd rather pay.
I don't want to marry the ass.
I want to buy it for myself.
You again?
Please, buy the pen.
I've already said no.
Just tell me...
what you want me to do.
- What about your principles? - I'll do whatever you ask me to.
Call security.
No, I'll do whatever you want.
For God's sake, help me.
Get this pile of shit out of my sight, along with his fucking pen.
C'mon, let's go.
Beat it.
I think it was the violin man...
that said the smell was coming from me.
Right to my face.
The worst thing is that it hurt me.
It was like some vicious circle.
I see the ass which I thrive on.
The price I pay...
is having to eat the garbage they serve in the sandwich bar.
The food always goes down like a rock, and so the drain stinks.
Orin other words, the ass makes the drain stink.
No, that's not it. That's not how it works.
Because even before I ever saw the ass, the drain stank.
And the ass doesn't have anything to do with it.
I sure wish that ass was here right now.
But women are all alike...
and if you don't watch out...
the invitations will make it to the printers.
I WAS IN HELL AND REMEMBERED YOU
Is today the day we're going to have that beer?
What you thinking about, man?
You're weird, you some kind of fag?
Let's have that beer.
She should be different.
Things weren't supposed to happen like this.
She's supposed to be more bashful...
sheepish. Then I'd pay her.
And she'd show me her ass sort of against her will...
because she needed the money.
I'd be in command.
She's breaking the rules.
I'd pay to see that ass.
- How much? - How much what?
- How much, jerk? - What?
How much would you pay for me to show you my ass?
Spit it out. I want to know, how much?
$ 500?
So that's how you get your kicks? That your fantasy?
No, it's my reality.
Get out of here you asshole. Get out of here.
Just because you've got money...
you think you can treat women like whores.
Didn't you ever think that I'd have shown it to you for free?
Get out of here jerk-off...
before I slap you in the face.
Weird, it was all so fast...
and I usually know what's going to happen.
Must be the eye, yeah, I that's it the eye.
It's bad luck, it's bad.
I know what happened, it wasn't the eye's fault.
It's just that I'm stressed out.
That's why I absorbed the vibes from everything.
Because everything I buy has a story, things have got vibes.
And I wind up absorbing them all.
But I'll change that.
The Smell from the drain is gone forever.
My thoughts are flowing again.
And today I feel a lot better.
My father served in the army, sit down.
Died in the Second World War.
My father's eye, he lost it in Monte Castelo.
I fought in that battle.
Monte Castelo? You were in Monte Castelo?
- In Monte Castelo? - I swear to God.
I was with the Third Battalion, Sixth Infantry Regiment...
first reconnaissance squadron.
My father's squadron.
Hail to the enlisted men!
You fought alongside my father.
It's true, my God, how small the world is...
I fought with your father.
Looking better now, you do look like him.
- I saved his life. - No. No.
The time they threw a grenade...
and I pushed him into the trenches.
It was close, real close.
Good morning everyone.
Today is a special day for me.
My father died in the war. My father's eye.
And this amazing man saved my father's life.
So today is a day to celebrate.
Will you accompany me in this celebration?
Anybody want money? Anybody want a cigar?
- Mr. Lourenço... - Wait a minute.
Who wants a cigar? Money, who wants money?
Around of applause for this fne man!
C'mon everyone.
Today was the day I was supposed to have gotten married.
The date written on the invitations from the printers.
Everyone hugs me.
Everyone likes my money.
Today I like everyone.
This is Steve who's autograph?
- Steve McQueen. - What does he do?
- Steve McQueen, the actor. - Actor, you're from the south.
Steve McQueen, the actor from Hollywood.
- He make good movies? - For sure.
- Example? - Le Mans.
- Never heard of it. - The Getaway.
Man, you don't know much about movies.
Not interested.
Man, this is worth a lot.
Man, I'm not interested.
But I can tell from your looks...
that you like exotic stuff.
Exotic stuff?
Celebrity stuff.
Everyone likes exotic and celebrity stuff.
Yeah, let me show you something.
- That's exotic. - Do you know who it belonged to?
- No. - That Stardust guy.
- Stardust? - Yeah, the one-eyed singer.
One-eyed Stardust... opera singer?
No, rock, David something or other. David...
- David, David... - David...
Well, man...
do me a favor, leave...
and tell the next in line to come in.
- Sure liked that eye. - Fuck off.
Today, I feel more like myself.
What do you want to sell?
The only thing you want to buy.
- You frightened me Mr. Lourenço. - What time is it Luzinete?
Around nine thirty.
I'm never late, what happened.
Hold on, I'll make you some coffee.
Make some coffee, coffee.
You cancelled your wedding, didn't you?
Sit down a bit.
It's a long story, and I'll try making it short for you.
There's this bathroom in my offce...
and I had a problem with the drain...
and it started stinking up the whole place, a very bad smell...
and it started to get on my nerves, irritated me.
And I think I began taking it out on everybody...
on my life, I don't know.
Why didn't you have it fixed?
I just never got around to it.
Life is like that, Mr. Lourenço.
We just let things slip by, and they start to get bigger.
At first, we don't pay too much attention...
because it isn't that important.
But they start growing, getting bigger.
Like a steam boiler, and then they explode.
You're right there.
When I began to work...
I had to be strong, cold-blooded...
because I buy things from people.
I had to offer them much less for their things to make any money.
But, in the beginning I felt sorry for them...
but I couldn't feel sorry...
if I wanted to get to where I am today.
So I began to be heartless...
more and more unfeeling.
And what did you get for being so heartless.
I don't know.
Must be sad.
I don't know if sad is the right word.
Would you like some more coffee?
Yes, Luzinete, that'd be nice.
Mr. Lourenço, seeing that we're here talking like this...
and I've worked for you foreight years now...
my name isn't Luzinete, it's Josina.
Hi.
What'll it be honey?
I just wanted to apologize.
For what I said the other day.
The way I talked...
I could have said it another way.
And I think I somehow hurt your feelings...
and that wasn't my intention.
You're confusing me with the other girl who used to work here.
You're joking, right?
No way, what'll it be?
Could you just turn around?
Turn around?
Yeah, turn around, just for me to be sure...
that you're not putting me on.
Ok.
- You have her telephone number? - Hey, man, take it easy.
- Can you get her number? - Me, no...
I wouldn't even give it to you if I had it, crazy loony.
You have the telephone numberof the girl...
- who used to work here? - What girl?
The blond girl, you have her number?
- No. - Not even in your register papers?
What registry, you think I register anyone around here man?
To pay vacations, pension funds?
I'd go broke like that.
- Can you get me her number? - No, no I can't.
Man, you look yellow.
Remember me?
I brought you the watch the other day.
Mr. Lourenço, what is going on?
He tried to rob me, call security.
This pig here tried to rob me, take care of him.
Poor guy, you'll screw him up for good.
You saw him attack me.
- Didn't you? - Yeah.
How much?
Around $ 30.
No, how much do they weight?
Around fve kilos.
Come here.
- Strong smell, huh? - It sometimes gets worse.
look buddy, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to buy your books.
It's just, I didn't plan on hauling them back.
- Why, you drive here? - No, I took the bus.
Fuck off.
Tough luck, ask the driver to let you get in through the back door.
Jeeez, you got shit coming back up through the pipes.
Do like the shit, come back later.
Who was the jerk who plugged up the drain?
I plugged it up.
Amateurs. Try fixing things themselves...
without spending any money, that's what you get.
I don't like the tone of your voice buddy.
Yeah, I'm like that, I sometimes say what I think, you got me?
- You talk big for an amateur. - I'm no amateur.
I'm not saying you're an amateur when it comes to shit and siphons.
What am I an amateur in then?
You're an amateur in the art of talking.
Jeez, seems like everyone's a mental case these days.
You don't know what you're saying or who you're talking to.
Look buddy, the conversation's great...
but we're going to have to bust this all wide open.
I'll tell you what you're going to do.
You're going to yank out this goddamn toilet...
and plug up the fucking hole.
Look, if we do that, you're going to plug up the whole pipe...
shit will come out all over the place.
If you want, we can do it...
but how about doing it the right way.
How much will that cost?
My partner takes care of the fnancial part.
Around two bags of cement, two sand, a new siphon...
Do me a favor, while you see how much it'll cost...
get this fucking toilet out of here...
and cement the goddamn hole.
But that won't fix...
your problem.
- Why? - Because the shit'll back up.
In here it won't.
No, but it'll leak out somewhere else.
Screw it, it won't be my problem.
Amateurs are full of shit.
No, no way, shit is full of shit.
And you two don't know what's going on here, do you?
- No? - No.
Why don't you just tell us?
- Yeah, tell us. - I'll tell you, come here.
These drains and pipes just seem...
like the place where the water and shit runs through.
But they aren't.
These holes are something else.
They're portals, portals to hell.
They spy on us through them.
The Smell from the drain.
I get some strange kind of satisfaction...
when I say these words.
It's like if I found myself again.
Perhaps the Smell is mine.
It was the Smell that led me to the ass.
A present from hell.
Hi.
Can I bring something in another day, cause I need the money?
You smell that Smell?
Yeah, I promise you I'll bring something tomorrow...
I just need a little.
- Money? - Yeah.
Show me your ass and I'll give you money.
If I show you, you'll give me some?
You swear?
Swear on my father's eye.
Lower, lower, the panties too.
The panties too?
Yeah, if not, I can't see your ass, that's it, lower.
- Can I get dressed? - No, turn around.
Turn.
Pull up your blouse.
That's it. More.
More. Like that.
Power is like an aphrodisiac.
The Smell gives me power.
The Smell and the eye.
I WAS IN HELL AND REMEMBERED YOU
I'm going to re-connect with my real self.
Life is a symbol. The drain is hell's eye.
Hell has only one eye. Hell and my father.
Mr. Lourenço it's your mother.
- Who? - Your mother.
Tell her I'm busy.
But she needs to talk to you now.
No way, tell her there's a line of people.
She said not to forget your medicine.
I won't.
Excuse me, there's people waiting.
OK. Listen.
Do you like it?
- Like it what? - The aroma of shit.
I don't have anything else, just this...
I've already given you everything I had.
You never gave me anything.
I've always paid you for your stuff.
I've sold everything I had to you.
Did I ask you to sell anything?
No, you never did.
And why did you sell?
Because I needed to.
Because you wanted to.
Right.
So say it, I sold my stuff because I wanted to.
I sold because I wanted to.
- That plate isn't worth anything. - But I need the money.
If you need money, you need to give me something.
No, I didn't like doing what I did...
I didn't feel good doing it.
So, go and get me something worthwhile.
But, I've got this plate.
No, I don't want the plate.
OK.
Then, I'll do it...
but it's only because I need the money.
It's the last time.
Listen... you're doing because...
I've never made you...
I've never made you do anything, did I?
No.
You never made me do anything, but I did it against my will.
That's what makes it so good.
Only for you.
Of course for me, I'm the one who's paying.
Fucking stench, I think it's the siphon.
No, it's not the siphon, it's the drain...
but I don't want to explain it to you, what you got there?
This here is a useless genie, poetry is all it's good at.
Even worthless to sell.
So, I don't know why you came here.
But, I like your face, you're alright.
You remind me of an uncle I have.
I'm going to show you something I think you'll like.
The eye from the man in the dollar bill.
No, no. Look this.
Pyramid, the man, the eye.
The eye from the man in the dollar bill.
Let me explain something to you.
This is not the eye on the dollar bill...
because that eye is the eye of God...
and this here is the other guy's eye. The other guy.
The other siphon?
Get this jerk out of here...
and bring me the next guy please?
- The siphon. - Bye buddy.
Of all the things I've ever had...
those that were worth anything, the ones I miss the most...
are the things you can't touch...
the things that are out of reach of our hands...
the things that don't belong in the material world.
That stupid jingle the gas truck plays.
You don't like it?
$ 15?
Yeah, you didn't like it.
And I really need the money.
Let me tell you something...
this isn't just any old music box.
Yeah, I know, it plays that stupid jingle the gas truck plays.
That's not what I mean, no sir.
This music box has been playing this song...
long before the gas truck began playing it.
And this music box is special.
You know why? Because it's got a story.
And that's why it's worth much more...
than what you're offering to pay for it.
You know how to write?
Yeah.
So do me a favor...
write down all the stories about this music box...
because when I sell it I'll give this paper as a bonus...
to the buyer to know all the stories about the music box.
And then...
it'll be a music box with a story.
You joking with me?
Only reason I'm taking this chickenshit...
is because I need the money.
But don't forget that...
this music box belonged to my mother...
and she used to play this song on the piano for me.
Now when you want to hearthis song...
your mother used to play you...
you're going to have to wait for the gas truck to come by.
THE GAME
For you.
This music box is full of stories.
You're a sweet guy.
How do we begin?
- Make me an offer. - I've made it.
No, it's got to be real.
I'd pay to see.
Pay to see what?
You naked.
What do you think I am?
A slut, a little whore.
Ha, ha, ha, what?
You need money, you're going to have to work to make it.
Work doesn't excite me, order me to show you.
Show me then you whore.
Pay then.
You want me to pay you real money?
Of course, you want to see or not?
Real bad.
How much?
How much would you pay to see?
Is that all? I think I'm worth more than that.
Is that all?
Show me.
I think I'm worth more than that.
Show me and I'll pay you more.
Pay me more.
You little pimp.
- Show me more you slut. - Disgusting.
Show me more, I'll give you more.
That's it, more.
- You bum - Slut.
- Pimp. - Whore.
- You wretch. - Show me.
Show me more, and I'll give it all to you.
- In my hand. - Show me.
In my hand. In my hand.
Don't throw it like that. Don't throw it like that.
I'm a married woman.
Do you have another box? Is this the only one?
Here.
Take it.
Here. Take more.
Pay then. I'm a married woman.
You busy?
You busy? Hey, you busy?
Hi?
Hi.
Who let you come in here?
What are you doing?
Who let you in?
I won't do it today. Here, take this.
I don't have anything left to offer.
I've got twenty here, take it. Go away.
I don't have any more money, I don't have anything.
You're a big liar.
Look... nothing here, look, look.
Why you saying that? Why you saying that?
What year were you born? What year were you born?
Sixty eight, why?
So, how'd your father die in the war, how'd he die.
My father died because of a hand grenade, why?
- Alie, it's a lie. - It's true.
My boyfriend said...
the war ended in 1945, so it's a lie.
Your boyfriend's a dope, just like you...
my father died before I was born...
- why are you saying this? - Your father didn't die before...
- you were bom, no way. - Shit, what's going on here?
Nobody was outside, I just came in.
What do you mean, just came in, what the fuck?
- I brought some playmobils... - Fuck your playmobils.
I don't want this shit here buddy.
- He molested me. - What do you mean, molested you?
He was smelling the drain.
- You molesting the girl man? - He was.
Me molesting. I'm molesting the girl?
- Are you craze? - Me? Molesting the girl?
Get him. Molested the girl.
- Take it easy. - You molesting the girl, man?
Are you all mad?
Girl? That girl is crazy!
So, Mr Lourenço, what happened here?
I don't even know what happened.
One big uproar.
What is it?
No way. You've got to pay.
The receptionist didn't know where the security guard was.
- I was taking a shit. - What?
Taking a shit, when I heard this racket.
Shame on you!
People began coming in...
I didn't see them, all my money disappeared.
My offce was full of people.
- Get him! - Shame on you!
- Son-of-a-bitch! - Scumbag!
- I went in and fired. - At whom?
Into the air.
Excuse me!
Tumult...
What can you tell me about the naked girl?
The what girl?
Naked girl?
The people in the next store, said...
a naked girl came running out.
The scarecrow's crazy, worse than the devil, bearded woman!
She's completely insane and came here to slander the boss.
- He molested me. - Who molested you?
He. He was smelling the drain.
- You molest the girl? - Me, molesting the girl?
- Accused him of rape. - "Rape".
Rape.
I was molesting you? I was molesting you?
- He was molesting the girl! - Take it easy!
Was she pretty?
Said she looked like the devil.
Himself!
What else could she look like?
Today, hell came out of the drain just to pay me a visit.
ABSENCE
You wouldn't believe it lady, the hubbub.
I wasn't here, I had some problem with my intestine...
but as soon as I saw what was going on. I ran in and...
The crowd dispersed and I saved the guy's life.
When I looked at him, after everyone had gone...
his face turned red in happiness...
I saved his life.
- Dr. Lourenço. - Everything OK?
Nice to see you like this sir, healthy, alive.
The receptionist was so frightened...
she ran off without asking for her pay.
Now it's the stupid security guard who attends to the clients.
He thinks he's real important now.
Little does he know he'll be fired.
Life is hard.
Hi. What'll it be?
Nothing...
just something to drink, I'm not feeling...
Don't be sad, honey. Here's a little present for you.
Your friend passed by the other day.
- When. - Around ten days ago.
Came to talk to Judith about suing the boss.
- She's going to what? - Sue the boss.
She left you a message.
- Left a message, what is it? - Yeah...
Tell me.
Said she hadn't found a job yet...
and that she was going to sell you what you wanted.
Said you'd know what it was.
- Yeah, I know. - Message delivered.
- Thanks a lot. - For nothing honey.
It's Japanese...
belonged to an uncle of mine.
Thanks, huh?
Lt'll be my father's leg. And I've already got the eye.
I can put him back together again in time.
My father, Frankenstein.
He only went out with my mother once.
I don't even know his name.
He never saw me. Never knew how much I loved him.
He left and I stayed.
He's sadder than me.
Because he probably doesn't have anyone.
And I've got him. My father Frankenstein.
I'm not going to take off my clothes today.
You've got something for me today, right?
You liar.
Depends on your point of view, how you see things.
Lies.
Even your face is a lie.
The face you wear isn't even yours...
it's the face from the commercial.
It's a mask of the guy from the commercial I use.
It's because you don't have a face.
If you take it off, you're left with a hole.
Go on, leave.
- Go on, leave. - You look like a lie.
- And you look like the truth. - You're a lie.
And you're the fucking truth.
Hello?
ONLY THE BIG BUTT AND NOTHING ELSE
You don't know how long I've waited for this.
Sit down.
I wanted to apologize, I shouldn't have said those things.
- So, why'd you say them? - It just came out...
But I wish I hadn't said it.
Not the way I did.
It made me sad.
I know, it made you sad, but I was sad too.
Were you?
Very much...
because I like you.
Like me, or only my ass?
That's hard to explain...
Why don't you try?
I hadn't noticed you at first.
I only saw how beautiful you were after I saw your...
You see?
You want me only because of my ass...
if not, you wouldn't be interested.
No, at first it was like that.
Now I want you.
But if you don't want me...
let me see your ass, just once.
From up close, just once.
I'll pay.
Before you said what you did, that day...
the thing I wanted most was for you to touch me all over.
I wanted to give myself to you, not sell.
Forgive me?
Not easy...
If you want to work here, as my secretary, if you...
need some money...
whatever you want, the way you want it.
The thing I want most in this world is to have you near.
What you just said, that was nice.
Forgive me, I didn't mean to hurt you.
I don't know if I'll be able to do it.
- Nice place here. - Yeah.
There's everything the world has to offer here.
I think I should just get it overwith.
But we haven't agreed on anything, like the price...
That's too much money just to look.
I just want to look.
OK, but if you don't like it will I have to give the money back?
No, no.
The money is yours.
No, no.
Let me see you in jeans first.
As I did before.
Button up.
That's it.
- Can I turn around? - Yes.
And so the ass becomes one more object...
like all the rest...
like everything I lock into the next room.
I'm so happy, so nervous, I hope I don't let you down.
Take down some things you have to do.
Well, very old or broken things...
you have to pre-select, so I don't waste my time.
Another very important thing...
you never, never enter my offce without knocking first.
- Enjoy your work. - Thank you.
I got another job.
He buys things, he helps people.
What you got for me this time gal?
I brought you something that belongs to you.
Let me see.
Lourenço! Lourenço! Lourenço!
You OK?
And so now, nobody enters and nobody leaves.